Our libido needs an illusion...

Usually, people read the lesson of Freudian psychoanalysis as if the secret meaning of everything is sexuality. But this is not what Freud wants to say. I think Freud wants to say the exact opposite. It's not that everything is a metaphor for sexuality, that whatever we are doing, we are always thinking about that. The Freudian question is, but what are we thinking when we are doing that?

If I may be a little bit impertinent and relate to an unfortunate experience, probably known to most of us, how it happens that while one is engaged in sexual activity, all of a sudden one feels stupid. One loses contact with it. As if, "My God, what am I doing here, doing these stupid repetitive movements?" And so on and so on.

Nothing changes in reality, in these strange moments where I, as it were, disconnect. It's just that I lose the fantasmatic support. In sexuality, it's never only me and my partner, or more partners, whatever you are doing. It's always... There has to be always some fantasmatic element. There has to be some third imagined element which enables me to engage in sexuality.

(...)

Why does our libido need the virtual universe of fantasies? Why can't we simply enjoy it directly, a sexual partner and so on? That's the fundamental question. Why do we need this virtual supplement?

Our libido needs an illusion in order to sustain itself.

(Slavoj Zizek - The pervert's guide to cinema)